It’s not a thinking man’s game.
What a good living a poor man could make, if only he could die for the rich.
The sky is falling but it doesn’t have to fall on you.
We resemble that remark.
Now we’re negotiating.
It’s too wet to plow.
It was a race to the bottom.
We can’t even say it. We don’t know why you would want to engage it.
Don’t talk about it, be about it.
Choke ’em if they can’t take a fuck.
That will hit you about three o’clock in the morning.
If “ifs” and “buts” were candy and nuts, it’d be Christmas every day.
It ain’t no fun when the rabbit’s got the gun.
Father, Son, and Holy Ghost caught the last train for the Coast.
Decorum is the better part of valor.
The swine is Divine.
Obedience is better than sacrifice.
God is love. Does God love me?
You take yourself with you wherever you go.
Even in Death Valley, a breeze blows once in a while,
In the land that your grandchildren knew.
Too much South in the mouth.
We don't have a dog in the hunt.
There are no sexy role models left.
Make a freight train take a dirt road.
That would be funny, if it wasn't so sad.
If you’ll suck a dick for money, you’ll suck a dick for free.
Weevils wobble, they don’t fall down.
Fear builds walls, not bridges.
Nothing worse than a used condominium.
I’d buy that for a dollar.
The sharpest machete in the shed.
Feed me, Seymour, feed me.
How’s your mommer nem?
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
It’s on, like Donkey Kong.
A stopped clock is right twice a day.
We’re like Delta Airlines. We get you there. But where?
Conception happens at arousal.
It’s not how deep you fish, it’s how you wiggle your worm.
We tear it up on the weekend.
Cowboy foreplay: “Get in the truck.”
All that and a bag of chips.
The First Church of the Last Minute.
The nearest emergency exit may be behind you.
The wheels on the bus go round and round.
Burn, Motherfucker, let the Motherfucker burn.
When you get to the end of your rope, let go: you’re six inches off the ground.
The perfect marriage vows are: “I like you pretty good. Let’s see how this goes.”
We’re a lotta things but ascared ain’t one of ‘em.
If at first you don’t succeed, keep on sucking until you do suck seed.
Enough is enough and some more is some more.
Sittin’ on the levee waitin’ on the Robert E. Lee.
The high school girls are giving it away for free.
Your carburetor won’t carb and your generator won’t gen and we won’t even say what your pistons won’t do.
His momma was a knockabout and his father was a traveling salesman.
Every movie is made better by at least one lesbian sex scene.
Gold hasn’t gone up since Jesus.
Get off the table, Mable, that two dollars is for the beer.
Bring out your dead. Bring out your dead.
Measure twice and cut once.
He’s not as good as he once was but he’s as good once as he ever was.
Leave the money on the nightstand.
Don’t write checks with your mouth that your ass can’t cash.
Three lefts make a right.
The bigger the dog, the smaller the cage they prefer.
James Brady had half a mind not to come.
It’s a white knuckle flight.
Lord suffering cats.
We can do this the easy way or we can do this the fun way.
Hope is a great thing to have but it’s a terrible strategy.
“Oh," said the blind man who reached his hammer and saw.
We’re like Red Lobster. We see food differently.
Where were you when lightning struck the Flying Jenny?
It was a business doing pleasure with you.
Bob got the gold mine, you got the shaft.
A Northerner is worth two bales of cotton and is twice as easy to pick.
If that doesn’t set you on fire, your wood is wet!
It’s like bare-backing at the whorehouse—you get what you get.
Many, many done tunkalow parzen.
Don’t hoist your own petard.
Too clever by half.
You got to do what you can and let Mother Nature do the rest.
When the cares of life go strangely dim, you’re on the right path.
Two tears and a bucket, motherfuck it.
Self-serving is not serving you.
You ain’t seen nuthin’, yet. Don’t worry, it’ll be over soon.
You are the only hell your mother ever raised.
Too much sugar for a dime.
He was tried and found wanting.
He was the load his mother should’ve swallowed.
Oh?! Oh!?
So - a needle sowing thread.
What a good living a poor man could make, if only he could die for the rich.
The sky is falling but it doesn’t have to fall on you.
We resemble that remark.
Now we’re negotiating.
It’s too wet to plow.
It was a race to the bottom.
We can’t even say it. We don’t know why you would want to engage it.
Don’t talk about it, be about it.
Choke ’em if they can’t take a fuck.
That will hit you about three o’clock in the morning.
If “ifs” and “buts” were candy and nuts, it’d be Christmas every day.
It ain’t no fun when the rabbit’s got the gun.
Father, Son, and Holy Ghost caught the last train for the Coast.
Decorum is the better part of valor.
The swine is Divine.
Obedience is better than sacrifice.
God is love. Does God love me?
You take yourself with you wherever you go.
Even in Death Valley, a breeze blows once in a while,
In the land that your grandchildren knew.
Too much South in the mouth.
We don't have a dog in the hunt.
There are no sexy role models left.
Make a freight train take a dirt road.
That would be funny, if it wasn't so sad.
If you’ll suck a dick for money, you’ll suck a dick for free.
Weevils wobble, they don’t fall down.
Fear builds walls, not bridges.
Nothing worse than a used condominium.
I’d buy that for a dollar.
The sharpest machete in the shed.
Feed me, Seymour, feed me.
How’s your mommer nem?
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
It’s on, like Donkey Kong.
A stopped clock is right twice a day.
We’re like Delta Airlines. We get you there. But where?
Conception happens at arousal.
It’s not how deep you fish, it’s how you wiggle your worm.
We tear it up on the weekend.
Cowboy foreplay: “Get in the truck.”
All that and a bag of chips.
The First Church of the Last Minute.
The nearest emergency exit may be behind you.
The wheels on the bus go round and round.
Burn, Motherfucker, let the Motherfucker burn.
When you get to the end of your rope, let go: you’re six inches off the ground.
The perfect marriage vows are: “I like you pretty good. Let’s see how this goes.”
We’re a lotta things but ascared ain’t one of ‘em.
If at first you don’t succeed, keep on sucking until you do suck seed.
Enough is enough and some more is some more.
Sittin’ on the levee waitin’ on the Robert E. Lee.
The high school girls are giving it away for free.
Your carburetor won’t carb and your generator won’t gen and we won’t even say what your pistons won’t do.
His momma was a knockabout and his father was a traveling salesman.
Every movie is made better by at least one lesbian sex scene.
Gold hasn’t gone up since Jesus.
Get off the table, Mable, that two dollars is for the beer.
Bring out your dead. Bring out your dead.
Measure twice and cut once.
He’s not as good as he once was but he’s as good once as he ever was.
Leave the money on the nightstand.
Don’t write checks with your mouth that your ass can’t cash.
Three lefts make a right.
The bigger the dog, the smaller the cage they prefer.
James Brady had half a mind not to come.
It’s a white knuckle flight.
Lord suffering cats.
We can do this the easy way or we can do this the fun way.
Hope is a great thing to have but it’s a terrible strategy.
“Oh," said the blind man who reached his hammer and saw.
We’re like Red Lobster. We see food differently.
Where were you when lightning struck the Flying Jenny?
It was a business doing pleasure with you.
Bob got the gold mine, you got the shaft.
A Northerner is worth two bales of cotton and is twice as easy to pick.
Below: Thanks, Bert!
If that doesn’t set you on fire, your wood is wet!
Below: Thanks, Bart!
It’s like bare-backing at the whorehouse—you get what you get.
Many, many done tunkalow parzen.
Don’t hoist your own petard.
Too clever by half.
You got to do what you can and let Mother Nature do the rest.
Below: Thanks, Anonymous!
When the cares of life go strangely dim, you’re on the right path.
Two tears and a bucket, motherfuck it.
Self-serving is not serving you.
You ain’t seen nuthin’, yet. Don’t worry, it’ll be over soon.
You are the only hell your mother ever raised.
Below: Thanks, Susana!
Too much sugar for a dime.
He was tried and found wanting.
He was the load his mother should’ve swallowed.
Oh?! Oh!?
So - a needle sowing thread.
7 comments:
"It's like bare-backing at the whorehouse - you get what you get."
"Redneck foreplay - get in the truck!"
"Many, many done tunkalow parzen."
"Don't hoist your own petard."
"Too clever by half."
"You got to do what you can and let Mother Nature do the rest."
-- Our iON
2 TEARS ....MOTHER FUCK IT
WHEN THE CARES OF LIFE GOES STRANGELY DIMMED...ON THE RIGHT PATH
THE HEAVIER THE CROWN...
SELF-SERVING IS NOT SERVING YOU
Thanks for adding these.
YOU AIN'T SEEN NOTHING YET, DON'T WORRY.. IT'LL BE OVER SOON.
(A BOY): FATHER .. WHAT IS HELL??
(PRIEST): YOU ARE THE ONLY HELL YOUR MOMMA EVER RAISED!!
(HEHE....)
Hi Ed, it’s Susana. Here’s a few:
Too much sugar for a dime.
He was tried and found wanting.
He was the load his mother should’ve swallowed.
Oh?! Oh!?
He’ll be hoisted by his own petard.
So - a needle sowing thread.
Thanks, Susana!
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